Be Organized
Always Ready to Leave

One of the most important reasons to be organized is for your own emotional and physical health.

I had to leave my wife because of her verbal abuse. I took it a long time.

Here is what you do when your wife is raging at you and you are sitting in a chair or laying in bed, soaking up her rage, not knowing what to do and hoping that she will stop.

Do not hit hurt.

You are not a man if you hit her. A man does not hit a woman. You will look at her raging face, the anger in her eyes and wonder what happened to the loving girl you married. You will want to punish her with force. The pain she is causing you will be so intense you will want to release it by hitting her.

Don't.

Obviously, it's against the law. But beyond that, it's just wrong. It's wrong to be with someone you want to hurt in any way. A good relationship will have NONE of that. Hurting someone is always wrong.

Do not rage back.

This will only escalate her rage. You are not a man if you start screaming back. A man does not need to scream at a woman.

Do not do anything but LEAVE HER.

Your marriage is gone. It is done. Your marriage is dead. There is no hope for her loving you. You have to be a man, admit that she doesn't love you, and leave. Admit that for whatever reason, she lost all respect and love for you. There is nothing there for you.

It will be the most difficult thing in the world. There is nothing harder than leaving your wife when you have poured all your love into your life together.

The longer you stay, hoping that it will get better, the harder it will be to leave.

But every second you spend soaking up her rage and listening to her abuse is another second of your life gone. You are getting closer and closer to dying and your spirit is leaving. You are a shell of a man. You are not you. You are what is left after she gets done with you.

What does this have to do with organizing?

A big problem with just leaving is that you will not be organized enough to leave.

It means you have to have your life together enough; you have to be organized enough so that you can leave anytime.

You have to be ready to leave at any time. Any time.

Your life is your life; you are not here to be a verbal punching bag for your wife. You must be ready to go at any time.

You cannot assume that everything will always be great with your wife. It would be wonderful if it was.

If you start to see signs that she is slipping into a bad place you must be on your guard and be ready.

Even if you have a wonderful loving relationship, you need to keep this idea in the back of your mind. You may need to escape.You need to be organized just in case.

I was not ready to leave. I waited and hoped it would get better. When I knew my marriage was doomed I started getting ready as best I could. It was terribly difficult, everything is so much trouble. But I did it. I had a little money and a bag packed. I was hoping I could count on my parents and friends. I was not sure I could, but I thought so. They came through for me.

You will need to lean on someone.

It would have been easier if I had a bunch of money available and if my life was not on red line. What I mean by that is I had lots of payments, very little cash, lots of debt, she wasn't working and the kids were still young. I had lots of my life together except for the most important thing which is to be organized enough to leave at any time.

In the end I could not take anymore. I felt like I was about to be destroyed.

You don't want to live like I did. I soaked up her rage for years. I listened to her screams, her anger, her abuse.

I lost myself in long hours at work.

I ate doughnuts and candy bars until I was sick, day after day.

I gained lots of weight.

I lost sleep.

And I got old, before my time.

I tried to avoid her. I walked on eggshells around her wondering what would set her off.

Be a man and be ready, be organized for your own life.

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